It'll click eventually: My journey ageing with dyspraxia

My name is Hannah Griffiths and I’m 29 years old. I wasn’t diagnosed with dyspraxia until I was 21. Now at 29 I can see so much I wish I’d known earlier, but I’ve also learned that getting older with dyspraxia isn’t all bad. 

Before my diagnosis, I always felt there was something wrong with me, but I could never quite put my finger on what. At school, I felt different, misunderstood, and often deeply frustrated. I knew I was trying hard. However, I couldn’t keep up the way others did.

When I finally got the diagnosis, I didn’t just feel relief. I also felt grief and anger. I went over my entire life in my head. Every moment that had felt impossible or humiliating, and asked: Why didn’t anyone see this? Why didn’t anyone help?

That was a tough period. Although over time, I started to see my diagnosis as a gift. It gave me words for what I experience. It taught me to stop blaming myself and instead work with how I am.

AGEING, ADAPTING, ACCEPTING

I’d love to say that with age, the challenges just went away. They haven’t. Executive functioning is still the biggest struggle for me: planning, organising, getting things done in order. It can be exhausting just trying to keep track of life, and I’ve felt the weight of burnout more times than I can count.

Fatigue is a constant companion. It’s not just physical tiredness, it’s the mental load of making sure I don’t forget things, of forcing my brain to go step by step when everyone else seems to rush ahead.

I have changed. I’m better at knowing what I need. I’ve learned to give myself patience and grace. I know that I can do most things if I give myself enough time, enough practice, and the right routine.

LEARNING MY OWN WAY

One of the hardest things about dyspraxia is feeling like everyone else “just knows” how to do things.

Take plaiting my hair, for instance. So many people tried to teach me and gave up. It just wouldn’t make sense. It comes so naturally to most people. One day, I decided I wouldn’t give up on myself. I sat with YouTube tutorials for hours on end, trying over and over. And eventually it clicked. Where and when are you supposed to put your strand of hair to make a plait? That moment meant a lot to me because that’s what living with dyspraxia is like: it might not make sense right away, but if you keep at it, it will.

FINDING INSPIRATION IN OTHERS

Cooking was another area I kept reading that dyspraxics struggle with. And it’s true! It’s a lot of steps, timing, and coordination. However, when I doubted myself, I’d think about Jamie Oliver. He’s spoken about his own learning difficulties, but look at what he’s achieved. If he could figure out cooking, I could too. It wouldn’t be easy, but it wouldn’t be impossible.

STRATEGIES THAT HELP

I’ve had to get creative about how I manage life:

• Building solid routines so I don’t have to remember every little thing.
• Giving myself permission to take things slowly and repeat steps until they make sense.
• Asking for help when I need it.

Communication has also gotten easier with age. I’m better at explaining what
dyspraxia is, how it affects me, and what kind of support I need.

THE GIFTS DYSPRAXIA GAVE ME

As hard as it can be, I know dyspraxia has shaped me in good ways too.

It’s given me compassion for other people’s struggles. Empathy when I see someone else feeling left out or behind. Determination to keep going when things are hard.
And kindness, both toward other people and, slowly, toward myself.

WHAT I’D TELL ANYONE ELSE

If you’re reading this and you’re worried about getting older with dyspraxia, here’s what I want you to know:
It’s going to be okay.

You’ll learn your own ways to adapt. Don’t be embarrassed to ask for help. You’re not failing if you need support, you’re being wise.

Dyspraxia doesn’t go away with age, but you’ll get better at understanding yourself. Better at explaining your needs. Better at forgiving yourself when things take longer.

You’ll find your own way to do things, in your own time.
And that’s more than good enough.

Author Hannah Griffiths